Cross stitch pattern of the word No using the colors of the Agender flag. Download the PDF here: Agender No Pattern
Grid Size:26W x 16H
Design Area:1.71″ x 1.00″ (24 x 14 stitches)
Colors: 4
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So, I’ve been exploring my gender for a while, and I most closely align with the term nonbinary, but I’m not sure if I actually fit well with any of the genders under the nonbinary umbrella. Agender is pretty close, but I’m worried that I’m not actually agender, I’m just sick and tired of so many things being pointlessly gendered.
I hate how a lot of things don’t just account for body types, but also masculinize or feminize things in really arbitrary ways, like how women’s shirts don’t have pockets or how deodorant for men uses extra plastic to sharpen the corners even when it makes it uncomfortable to hold.
I’ve never experienced gender euphoria. I’ve never thought, “Ah yes, this is what my gender should feel like!” People on trans subreddits will talk about making Picrews or customizing game characters to look like themselves with their preferred gender, but none of my Picrews look like me. They’re all different. None of the characters I’ve made are transition goals, because it’s so hard for me to imagine what I should look like, just not like this.
And it sucks how the default nonbinary look is that smooth exactly androgenous K-pop star look, and not a beard and heels even though both are equally nonbinary. I hate how everything new and scary has to be beautiful or else no one will take it seriously. Even Conchita, the most famous person with a clearly bigender expression, is all long flowing hair and ballgowns.
It’s not just gender, but everything is so pointlessly beautiful, because beautiful things sell better. Sometimes I feel like everything that I think is beautiful is just a carefully constructed advertisement.